Tuesday, August 17, 2010

08082010

It is our fifth night here (actually, a new day is upon us), and the moon is hanging in the sky as if by an invisible string, but I can’t see the stars… maybe for the brightness of the moon. Still, there is enough glimmer in the sky to drape a rippling mirror over the water. And I am awake… eyes wide open… unable to sleep. Too many images inside my head. Too many beautiful people… earlier today… and earlier this evening at dinner. I think they are more beautiful than usual because they are tanned. We look more beautiful, more vibrant, more alive, when our skin has been kissed by the sun. We look… as though we have made love. No…we look as though we have had sex… lots of sex… and have been left glowing in the aftermath of our spent desire. Or do we have more sex when we are by the ocean or sea? It must be the fishy smell of the shore that implants thoughts of sex into the very front of our minds. Or maybe we feel more sexual because we are in an elemental, primitive setting… as glitzy as that setting might be.

I like that this place is quiet… adult-oriented. Not that I mind children. But sometimes, I need my peace. I just want to eat… and drink… and nap… and swim… and eat and drink and nap and swim… quietly. I do too much of everything else in life when I am not on vacation. And I live with somebody else’s kids when I am working… eight hours a day. I am entitled to do nothing at all when I’m on holidays. And so, this afternoon, I laid back in the wet sand and let the gentle water lap at my body… and the sand get stuck in my hair… while I listened to Pink Martini on my iPod… and finished reading Venus in Furs. And when I was done reading, I watched all the lovely people walking around on the beach… playing games in the water… sipping their brightly colored drinks. My husband and I also sipped our cocktails… and played in the water. And we did our “knot” plunge, where we wrap our arms and legs around one another and make a somersault in the water. We started that when we were on our honeymoon… and now… every time we go to the beach… we do it. I actually think it’s pretty cool we haven’t drowned, yet... because we've come close a couple of times... he he he. And then we came out of the water and chatted… and fell asleep… and woke up burned by the sun. But these are nice burns… every one of them welcome, as far as I am concerned. I can feel them pulsing right beneath the surface of my skin. And that’s an alive kind of feeling!

It was pure luck that brought us here. We could’ve ended up vacationing in any of a number of other places … but here it was meant to be. My husband and I scribbled some names on slips of paper… the names of places we thought we might want to visit. We didn’t know how to pick… there were so many cool places to choose from after we had each made our list. And besides, everything else we do in life is so calculated… so prepared and measured. Why not just live off the cuff, for a few days? So the slips of paper were prepared, placed into a bowl, and I got to stick my hand inside and choose one. And when I was unfolding the paper, we were both staring at each other… because now, all of a sudden… it was about to matter. “Turks and Caicos,” I announced, and we both paused for a moment before we squealed like little kids… though what in the world we were squealing about, I don’t know. It’s not as if we knew what to expect. But really? It’s been a sliver of Eden, so far.

But… so many people alone, here. And it’s especially noticeable at dinner. They are always the most interesting to watch. We are so vulnerable when we are alone… so exposed… especially if we are away from familiar surroundings. We behave with a self-conscious awkwardness. Some people say they feel perfectly comfortable being alone in a social setting. That may be true… but I am skeptical, based on what I observe.

There was the elegant young lady in a blue dress that made her skin just twinkle. She read while she dined… and licked her lips after every sip of wine. I suppose she was using the book as a way to avoid making eye contact… or maybe she was engrossed in her reading. But at dinner? And then there was the man who looked at the water all night. There were so many gorgeous women he could’ve been looking at (or gorgeous men, if that’s his vibe), but his attention was focused on the sea. He only turned his eyes away from the water to look at his plate, and as soon as the food was ready on his fork, he turned his gaze right back to the water. It seemed he was fascinated by some distant memory playing out on the silver screen of the ocean.

And then there was another man… wearing the sparkling eyes of anticipation. It looked like he had been waiting a while… for someone. And, telling from his agitation, that someone was a lady. There was something intriguing about him… he twitched uncomfortably… he shuffled his knife and fork and napkin and empty stemware… he darted his eyes all over the terrace. And I couldn’t help wondering what he would have said to the lady he was waiting for (if there was, in fact, a lady) if he had gotten the chance. Or… what would he say… if he were to write a letter… without ever having to send it? And, supposing he had a fetish? What type of fetish would it be? A fetish for… hair (too ordinary)… nails (nah)… feet (cliché)… shoes (shoes… getting there, but not quite there yet)… teeth, blood (blech!), toes, knees, chins (yawn), eyes, lips (zzzzzzz), ears, tears. Tears! Can someone have a fetish for tears? Why not?

So, here is the supposed letter:


My Beloved… My Sunshine,

I am thirsty… and I dream of being with you. I dream while the shadows lengthen at dusk. And from behind my eyes I watch your eyes smile. You know how I dislike your obliviousness to my need of you. You know how I have wanted you for some time. You know how I have wanted for your eyes to stop smiling… and you know why.

You are in my gut like a wind that is trapped in a hurricane… violent and awkward. And I am insatiable with longing for you. But I will wait as long as necessary. I will be here when you decide you want me. I will bring you tea in bed. I will dress like a gypsy… a farmer… a slave. I will dress like a woman, if that will please you… and traipse like an impoverished whore. Whatever you want, my darling.

But then, Love, you know it is my fondest desire to make you cry. Cry, while I ravish your orange-blossomed skin with kisses and bites the likes of which you have never known. My dream is that you lie down on your back… a little lower… just like that. And cry for me. You know your tears captivate me… drive me mad. If you tilt your head to the side, your tears will flow effortlessly. And if you half-close your eyes, they will flow with more patience… the better to make me burn. Half-close your eyes, my love, and pretend to sleep. Let the rain come. Lie down before me and say, I am Goddess. And I will say, I am your servant… your serf… your slave. Please, don’t make me torture you. My heart does venerate… oh, how it does! But it is myopic and fickle.

Let me get here beside you… all the closer to feast upon the salty wetness of your tears when they are delivered. I want to watch the silk of your gown slide like a caress over your tear-drenched shoulders and down the temple of your body… and fall with a whisper into the pool of tears on the ground. I want to draw ecstasy slowly from your throat… your feet… your eyes. I want to watch you go blind with your tears while you try to whisper, Can you feel inside me? as your back arches, and together we fall. I will do anything for you. And you may do with me as you please… so long as I can see those enchanted crystal rivers gush from your eyes. Make me an oath… a fragment of an oath… something to appease my pining. For, is this not love?

But it is getting late, my darling, and the darkness awakens my quiet wounds. Night has fallen, and I can no longer see the paper. I fear writing over the edges and on the table, where another’s eyes might discover my thoughts… to my mortal shame.

Until soon, then, my love. I will wait for you. And time will wait. The second hand will tick in place. The postman will deliver no mail. Come soon. And cry for me, that I may quench my thirsting spirit, that I may comfort my feverish brain! In my avaricious mind’s eye, I wrap my arms around you and press them together until we both are breathless. Perhaps you will shed a tear for me, there, from between your half-closed lips. Come to me. Look at me. And tell me this is not love.

Yours,
S.

* * * * *

I just turned that man into a tear fetishist (there’s got to be a name for that) and an obsessive mess. Supposing he’s perfectly normal? But then, supposing he isn’t? And what’s not normal about having a fetish? We all have them. But… seriously, he was miserable enough without my adding a fetish to the brew. And besides, my language was a bit… passé. I might as well have written "To die, to sleep no more." But, Venus in Furs is still haunting me. And it was all fun and games... the man will never know.

I'm sleepy... very sleepy. And a bit sad. We'll be leaving in a couple of days. How come the fun doesn't last forever?

August 8, 2010
@ 3:24 a.m.

47 comments:

  1. Too beautiful for words, dear Nevine...

    You share so deeply of yourself here, and leave me smiling, and wishing I could see a movie of all of the above... the water, the sun, the sand, the moon... oh... and the people too, doing all the things that people do on vacation. We are so lucky to have you as tour guide, writer, director, producer, dreamer... yes, especially that last... dreamer...

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  2. Wow, this is from your diary? You still amaze me and you look so beautiful and happy in your picture. Glowing indeed! You must be so in love!

    This is my favourite part:

    We look… as though we have made love. No…we look as though we have had sex… lots of sex… and have been left glowing in the aftermath of our spent desire. Or do we have more sex when we are by the ocean or sea? It must be the fishy smell of the shore that implants thoughts of sex into the very front of our minds. Or maybe we feel more sexual because we are in an elemental, primitive setting… as glitzy as that setting might be.

    You touch on so many great things: the influence of beauty, happiness and nature on sex and love. I didn't imagine one could find such things on a beach. I don't care much for the beach. You proved me wrong!

    I also love that you observed people on the beach and seemed to enjoy their happiness and love as much as your own.

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  3. Captivated, deeply implanted in me are your words now i believe i have completely learned your style of writing and how you toy with words and the minds of readers. This excerpt was quite fantastic, i have done all these things while on vacation too...people watching and giving them characters from my mind, attached quirks to them that they may or may not have. You're a keen observer and that helped make your imagery so vivid because it seemed while reading i was looking at the man through your eyes. And poor him probably his date stood him up, i enjoy quiet places as well with minimal noise when on vacation :) Your photo is just mesmerizing, My sweet delight you're very beautiful and you captured me with all the lines above especially these ones"

    "But then, Love, you know it is my fondest desire to make you cry. Cry, while I ravish your orange-blossomed skin with kisses and bites the likes of which you have never known. My dream is that you lie down on your back… a little lower… just like that. And cry for me. You know your tears captivate me... drive me mad."

    Fetishes about crying..i love it when a man cries so there i said it and yes don't we all have some fetish Darling?...:))

    With Love,
    Wild Rose~

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  4. My dear, darling Nevine,

    What a profitable vacation you had!
    I don't know where to start... Well the first part is just so inviting... and those descriptions you make of the sun and what they produce in our bodies and sex...

    That's what a vacation means to me, that's what it must be, Sun, Water, Naps, Reading, Drinks and all once and again...

    But of course in the meanwhile one is an observer of the others around... I wish I could go on my own anywhere, but then <i'd choose a monastery, not a holiday resort!

    As the great writer you are you've made the best of it by looking at the 'fetishist' and writing down his letter, which is not his but YOURS,and what a stranger's mind can bring to your sublime one.

    Shame, it is, we cannot keep vacations as long as... when?--- There must be a time we do not do it so that when we get the chance we enjoy it to the fullest... as you have!

    Love your writing!Love you!
    :)
    Dulce

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  5. Nevine,

    First off I am amazed at the long entry you have managed to make in your journal even while on vacation. Vacations are bliss and writing also seems a task but you, oh my god! How much you have written!
    It was lovely to gaze at your picture in the lap of your beloved and the equally tender words which were filled with an assortment of images. People-watching always opens up new and interesting areas of the interior landscape. Glad that you enjoyed every bit of it. "They say I'm a dreamer, but I'm not the only one."

    Much love,
    Susan

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  6. If I had been a man, you would have been my type and I would have dreamt to have you as a wife! And my fetish would have been that you write just as you do!

    ***
    Biiiiggg BISOUS, ma belle*******

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  7. What a diary entry!

    I know guys that have a special interest in tears. Those that love to see the red where there should be white in the eyes. Not quite fetishists though. That was fun to read and it sounds like a wonderful vacation!

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  8. Nevine what have you done to me?
    i see this as clearly as day, the sun kissed skin and the smell of the ocean. the bright colors of ocean and sand as it sticks to you. Nevine you have taken me with you on your vacation and I feel spent....

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  9. what a beautiful glimpse into a beautiful soul.


    Steven Anthony
    Man Dish~Metro Style

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  10. What a beautiful picture of relaxation, peace and joy! My hope for you, Nevine is that those sparkling eyes would only gush enchanted crystal rivers of happy tears.

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  11. An exquisite journal entry, Nevine. Written in love and in the company of the one you love. Thank you.

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  12. Owen – Oh, Owen. I am neither a tour guide nor a director nor a producer. No, those things I am not. But a dreamer and a writer, I am… and a lover of life. And so, when life delivers a reality that is packaged as a dream, surely I must write about it. I am happy to have taken you on this journey with me… fumbling tour guide that you believe me to be. ;-)

    Ashley – I think beaches are fascinating places to observe people. When we are lounging around on the beach, we abandon those defenses and those costumes we wear in real life. We are out there… exposed… and usually showing our true nature. The joy found on beaches is contagious. We watch others playing and laughing and enjoying life, and all of a sudden, we want to do the same. And the good news is that we can… because we’re right there… so we do. So much fun to be at the beach, Ashley, how can you not enjoy it? But you know… I’m sure you get your pleasure from other places where people come together to have fun… That I know!

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  13. Wild Rose – I’m quite sure we all engage in similar activities when we’re on vacation, not the least of which is people-watching… everyone in such close proximity to everyone else… and we’re all relaxed and unwound. And oh… you like it when a man cries… well thank you for sharing that. ;-) It’s not often a man cries in front of a woman, but I do have to admit that I, too, find that quite captivating. I’m so happy you enjoyed reading this, my dear Wild Rose. And it’s nice to know we have some things in common. ;-)

    Dulce – Sweetest, profitable… oh, yes! Most profitable for my psyche, which needed a major overhaul before I had to return to work. But it’s back to reality, for me, and yes, it’s too bad the vacation couldn’t have lasted longer. And that fetishist comment of yours… of course it’s ME, writing the letter with my twisted mind that tried to look into the mind of a poor, lonely, unassuming man, intruder that I am! But, I have since forgiven myself. I’ve led myself to believe he might have enjoyed this other image of him… he he he. As it is, he’s clueless. ;-) I love you back, Sweetest!

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  14. Susan – I have to be honest and tell you that this entry was the only entry I made while we were there. The first few days were just vegging out days, and on that evening I had a bout of insomnia that was relentless and wouldn’t let me go until I had let out all of the thoughts that had been clamoring in my head. I usually write regularly in my journal while I’m on holidays, but this time, I didn’t want to put in the energy. But just that one night, I made up for the days missed… and the days that would come. And now I have the journal entry as an added souvenir of that trip. Lots of love back to you, dear Susan. :-

    Cremilde – That is the most flattering comment, you sweet friend, you! I mean, it’s nice to know that you, too, can go inside the mind of a man… because I sure feel lonely sometimes… wondering if I am the only one who does that. ;-) Merci, ma belle! Bisous bisous bisous! Xoxoxo

    Menina – “Those that love to see the red…” Now that is a twist on an already uncommon fetish… so I would agree… not quite a fetish. And yes, it was a lovely trip. Thank you for sharing the fun, Menina.

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  15. Sir Thomas – I know you are no stranger to the ocean and to delightful places to visit and fall in love all over again with people and oneself and life. So, thanks for tagging along… and for liking!

    Steven – Thank you; that’s so sweet. :-)

    ConTemplate – Well, thank you for that kind wish. It is my hope, too, that the tears always be tears of joy. I just had to give things a bit of a wicked twist. I wouldn’t be me if I didn’t. Know what I mean? ;-)

    Martin – And thank you for taking the time to read it. It was certainly written in love, yes, and I wanted to share that beautiful moment. Thank you, Martin.

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  16. my own flesh tingles still from the sun kissed days on the white hot sands - there - in T&C - laying on the rippling sands and knot plunging in the tides - through your beautiful story - magnificently done, as always, lady - a journey to behold here in your vision quest!

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  17. A beautifully reflective journal entry, it read like a Virginia Woolf novel - I have always adored the stream of conciousness style. I share your love of holidays and people watching, of reading beneath the soft glow of the sun. This was a true delight to read, Nevine :)

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  18. i grew up by the sea and it is still amazing what it unleashes by proximity. so many storms of the mind and waves of passion crash upon her shores and us - oh the sea.

    thank you for sharing this, this beautiful collection of souvenirs from your time by the sea.

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  19. truly a writer you are, my friend

    blessings to you and yours...

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  20. Tu es trop belle sur la petite photo qui s'affiche dans la bande latérale de mon blog. Alors j'ai eu envie de regarder la photo en plus grand format;o)
    J'ai bien peur que tous les garçons qui passent par ici ne tombent amoureux de toi!

    ***
    Biiiggg biiiizzzouuuuzzz*******

    ps: oui, je crois que je peux me mettre dans la peau d'un homme, mais par moments seulement;o)

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  21. Oh! I had "teeless" to type!!!
    What does it mean?

    ***
    Re-biiiggg biiizzzooouuuzzz*******

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  22. And then I had "propped"!
    Well, well, well...

    ***
    Re-re-biiiggg biiizzzooouuuzzz*******

    ps: I will not read the next letters as a word, I promise;o)

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  23. That place sounds so peaceful. Everyone should visit somewhere that relaxing every so often. The letter you wrote knotted my stomach, I could relate to some of the feelings in it.

    You have such an amazing way with words, Nevine.

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  24. Amazing writing... I really enjoyed this.

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  25. Jenean - I'm so glad you enjoyed it... and that you were transported there. It is such a magical place, and I will never forget it. And I'm glad I have this memory of it to always read in my journal... and always remember. I'm happy to have shared it with you, Jenean - such an appreciating reader.

    Sam - Thank you. And... ahem... Virginia Woolf... I daresay I don't come close to her style. But stream of consciousness is one of my favorites, too... especially when writing in my journal. There is nothing more boring than a planned out diary entry, don't you think? Thank you for your sweet comment, Sam.

    Kim - And thank you for reading it. It was a pleasure to write it, though I was suffering from insomnia that evening... yet the memories will always remain. Yes, the sea does something inexplicable to our minds, doesn't it?

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  26. LW - Thank you... you are always so nice... and ever so giving... of your blessings... and good thoughts. I appreciate it all!

    Crémilde - Mais mois, j’ai pas peur du tout. Je ne suis amoureuse que d'un seul... et c'est mon mari, que j'adore. Qu'ils tombent amoureux... avec une photo! Quelle horreur!!! Et "teeless"... hmmm... je pense que ça veut dire, peut être, "sans t-shirt"... parfait pour la plage, en tout cas, non? ;-) Gros gros gros bisous!!!

    Eva - I agree that we all should visit a quiet place every so often. So many times, even when we are on holidays, we visit crowded places and run around trying to do too much... and it sort of defeats the purpose. I agree entirely.

    Bard - Thank you. I really appreciate that.

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  27. That letter made me crack up! That poor guy will now be labeled forever in our minds as a tear fetishist (word?). And he has no idea. Ha!

    You sound like you're having such a blast. I'm so happy for you. Enjoy and relish the vacation, we all need them.

    Jai

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  28. And that pic of you is gorgeous! You look so happy.

    Jai

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  29. Well, this time I think I went inside the mind of a psychopath! One like in "Vertigo"!
    But don't worry! I've recovered to my norman bates state;o)))

    Ah, yes! Sans t-shirt sur la plage et assise dans le sable "propped" contre son chéri!
    Ça me donne envie de repartir au bord de la mer;o)

    ***
    Une marée de bisous à la brise marine*******

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  30. I was amused and intrigued reading some of the above comments and answers here... I think it is not with a photo that we can't help but fall in love with when we come here, as on a pilgrimage, but with the shining intelligence, which as observed in previous visits here, is so bright it shines like an entire galaxy in the night sky... and there are many kinds of love... if we fall a little in love with everything we read here, it is not the same sort of love that the Grenouille and I share, have shared for 19 years, or that you share with your husband, but it is love nevertheless, Platonic love perhaps; who could not love reading your incredibly complex and passionate observations of life ???

    True though, the photos of your beautiful exterior surfaces don't hurt anything... but again, it is not the photos we fall in love with here... it is your shining soul... And also, I think it is not just your male readers who fall in love with you after reading your work ... If I was in a female body, I'm sure I would still love making this pilgrimage in the same way... and would also appreciate the photos too...
    :-)

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  31. Well said Owen!
    And I agree entirely with you;o)

    ***
    Big bisous and have a nice day*******

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  32. Jai - Actually, I'm back already... have been back a few days. I NEVER blog when I'm on vacation... NEVER!!! Oh, and I did look up tear fetishists and guess what... "dacryphiliac" is the word. So, there you go! Yes, he has no idea... poor guy... I did have a bit of guilt after the fact... but yeah... he'll never know. ;-)

    Owen - You are truly a shining light... in every sense of that phrase. And you both flatter and humble me... because surely such words are humbling. I am truly beaming... from the inside out... at these lovely words you've said... every one of them a jewel. Love has many forms, but such love as you describe is radiant... and much appreciated... felt... and reciprocated. Well, Owen, you know (or maybe you don't) that you are one of my favorites... and this I mean most sincerely!

    Cremilde - And you... my dear friend... so creative with your commentaires as to leave me speechless... but smiling every time... at your mind that is both wicked and delightful... and just the type of mind that invites my highest admiration. :-)

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  33. Too bad Sunshine didn’t get that letter. It was wonderful. So glad you enjoyed the Turks and Caicos. We stopped by there when we were on our extended cruise. Most of our time was spent with other boaters but we also had a great time. Sunshine and the sea, what a combination. It’s almost as if the vibrating sunrays allow a fissure in the atmosphere that permits one to enter into a parallel dimension; one, by the way, that you described so well. Also, your picture is fabulous.

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  34. lovely reflections..

    the memories are the treasure.
    Glad to see you put it on record here.

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  35. ****/\****
    **<****>**
    ***\/\/***

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  36. I was the lady dining and reading my book to avoid eye contact, but that's what I most wanted!
    And you and your husband looked so happy together! I could not start any chit chat and importunate you!
    If I could have only approached that man who looked endlessly at the sea!
    I cry such diamond tears!

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  37. Judy - The way you described how the sun vibrates and falls in Turks and Caicos is right on! Yes, it is as if we are entering into another dimension... very true... and such a magical dimension at that! So glad you liked my letter, too. It was a fumbling exercise while I tried to make myself tired enough to go to sleep. Your comments are always so appreciated, Judy.

    Jingle - Thank you for stopping in... and for sharing your kind thoughts.

    Cremilde - :-), ma belle!

    Adriana - How lovely it is to see you here! And you have a goldmine of an imagination... to have taken yourself there, and to have become that lady. And sometimes, we do like to just sit with ourselves, I have to admit. My hope, Adriana, is that your tears, if they must be shed, will always be diamonds that glimmer with your shining spirit. There is comfort in tears... yet. I have missed seeing you here, Adriana. Your honesty is like a soothing balm. :-)

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  38. When I read your words, I always feel like I'm reading something very old. I believe you have an "old" soul. I mean that in a good way. In the best way...

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  39. Nevine, it would be so hilarious if that guy stumbled across this blog and recognised himself.

    Jai

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  40. Truly Nevine I FEAR writing a comment here. Not an "afraid" fear, more like TREMBLING I am. In the presence of a goddess (SO fully human a goddess you are!) I am so humbled reading this piece.

    It is Owen (above) who wrote so aptly: "it is not the photos we fall in love with here... it is your shining soul..." Oh Nevine I have realized that from my first read of yours.

    You are well-gifted with many of the great writer's attributes. That wonderful talent of "being" someone else, to put yourself inside another--I call it intrusion (your word?) in combination with your masterful use of introversion, format you-the-writer as superb and outstanding, Nevine!

    It is with huge pleasure that I look forward to slowly devouring whatever posting you may offer us.

    Much love, from
    Steve E

    The photos are certainly NOT ignored--grin!

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  41. Pat - Oh, how I love the thought of being an old soul. It allows me to have a certain wisdom... and I like that. Thanks, Pat.

    Jai - And what are the chances? But knowing my luck... ;-)

    Steveroni - How wonderful it is to see you. Yes, I know you're out and about with your scooter and your adventuresome spirit so I am most lucky to have been paid such an honorable visit. And I am the one who is trembling with joy... and feeling humbled... at your comment... so sweet... and filled with appreciation. It is so appreciated by me to be appreciated by you. And if I have any talent, it is because wonderful people like you keep coming back and pumping me up. Come and devour all you want of my writing... it is yours! I hope you are enjoying a blast of a time and... stay safe! :-)

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  42. First off, Nevine, you are gorgeous! Love how happy you are in that photo!

    Secondly, I love how your mind works. I resonate with it so completely. As you know, I recently traveled alone and I watched people and did exactly what you have done. I created stories. I read their minds and dined alone, but did so comfortably, and on purpose ;)

    Words seem to escape me when I try to describe what your writing does for me or says to me. It is very visual and flowing and introspective hmmm is that the word? Either way, I truly LOVE your writing and I will be back to read your latest post. I am still catching up here and there. Life has been incredibly busy.

    much love~
    Calli

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  43. Calli, you have a point, seriously, about being alone. Sometimes we do want to be alone, and on purpose. Sometimes we even need it. Maybe I am just the type of person who shies from too much solitude. I have always been that way... and only recently learned that there is value in spending time with oneself. My husband went away for six months for work, and I had no choice but to face the music. It was a challenge, especially at the beginning, but I started to realize that I was evolving in a way that I liked. At the end, though I hated my husband's absence, I did learn how to be by myself and manage. Of course, I made this journal entry while saturated by the presence of my husband while on a trip, so I was truly biased and judgmental. But yes, I agree with you entirely.

    And do come back, whenever the time is right for you... no rushes... I know life is hectic, Calli. Please don't feel pressured.

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  44. Awww, my precious friend, what am I reading here?
    First off,I'm SO GLAD to hear that you had such a great vacation!
    What a great soul is erupting from this gem writing piece. You are truly my sunshine and my endless inspiration and one of the most beautiful persons/friends I was lucky enough to have met through blogging thing.
    You never fail to impress me with your fascinating writing.
    While reading this the images run through my mind making each minute a bliss.
    I can feel the sensation reading this and your breath as well.
    You are gorgeous in that photo up there and you look so happy. Can't help it but I am sooo
    happy for you.
    What a great couple you make you two! :))

    Love and hugs,

    Bxxxxxxxxxx

    TTYFF

    P.S. Sorry for being late to comment. I've being having major issues with my computer.
    I hardly was able to post two entries these two past days..can you imagine, it took me so many hours to post them?
    arg!!(That's a Viking talk, I think).

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  45. Betty, how wonderful to see you! I was starting to wonder where you were. And I swung by to visit you this morning, and thought I'd ask. Honestly, I thought, "Maybe she wants some quieter blogging, especially after the break," and I figured I would leave you be for a while. But then I got the compulsive itch to nag you this morning, so there we go! ;-) I'm sorry to hear you're having computer issues. Those are always such a pain, aren't they? I hate that!

    Yes, we had a blast of a vacation, as I'm sure you did. Any time away from the usual is a huge reason to celebrate! And I'm so happy you enjoyed my journal entry. It was actually the only thing I wrote while we were away. I was too lazy to do much writing because I just wanted to lounge around. But just for one night, I was struck with insomnia and so I figured I'd make myself tired by writing. It always works! ;-)

    Thank you so much for your very sweet comments and and you are a huge sunshine in my world, too. You can't imagine how much your words give me the encouragement and "push" to just keep going with it all!

    Love and huge hugs back to you, Betty.
    xoxoxo

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  46. You're bang on the money that sun, sand and sea make for a perfect sensual combination. enjoy your hols! :-)

    Greetings from London.

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  47. Am back from the hols, Cuban. But still dreaming... ;-)

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Your thoughts are deeply appreciated.