Self-portrait, Nevine Sultan
You dodge me, My Ghost.
You shy away
when my light flares
inside the silent spaces
you inhabit.
And, for this,
I have no words.
Though I would like to say,
Sit with me. Hear me.
I would like to say,
I cannot stop myself
from picking roses
and clipping their thorns.
But, to whom
does it matter?
Blood is drawn, spills,
and tomes are scribed
in the dungeons
of silence.
My Ghost, only you know my essence.
35 comments:
amazing...only our inner self truly knows who we are, we dont /cant hide from them, put on different faces/mask...they are always just under the surface,, knowing all...
If people could gaze into our inner world, just a quick peek, they would be either shocked or fascinated, or both. It's such a pleasure to read you again after a long time away from my blog. Just came back from Cornwall yesterday.
What a great, great poem.
Greetings from London.
Several tries at writing a comment have found me becoming mired more and more deeply in the morass of creation and conscience.
Simplified, I'm still of a belief that we are all pretty much the same, even to our essences. I can trick myself more easily than I can dupe you, of that I'm certain. Our consciences' knowledge of 'right' and 'wrong' is basically the same. O FISH! WHY can I not keep it simply simple?--grin!
Beautiful tight write, Nevine. And the image(s), eyeball-to-eyeball, that's where it all comes down! Keep writing girl--we LOVE it!
PEACE!
Such imagery. The problem with commenting here is that your stuff is almost always so profound - so deep - and so personal - it's an illumination of YOU - and how can I comment on YOU when you ARE - you are who and what you are and what I see is perfect.
Our ghosts delicately guard us and sometimes guide us.
"But to whom
Does it matter?"
Ah, dear Nevine, but it matters to us... the ghosts who inhabit the deep vast ethereal spaces of the world wide web, the web which would span the universe were there cables to go there, cables to carry your whispers, your thoughts, your blazingly brilliant poetry... Though you may languish in dungeons of silence, we are all in dungeons, but I thank the stars that even dungeons have cracks between stones, or under their heavy doors, which let voices be heard from out of the fog... I can only imagine you at a table scribbling away deep into the night, yet the image is there.
So good to see you are still putting a message in a bottle, and launching it on the blog sea from time to time, to see on what distant beaches it may reach some stranded soul...
(reminds me of Bob Dylan's song, Visions of Johanna, and the line where he says, "and we sit here stranded, though we all do our best to deny it")
And I really like the image you found to go with this, the black and white inversion, but which is the ghost ???
Funny, just a moment before reading this, I just finished a post, in which there figures a ghost-like face, disappearing, looking out as from a great distance, from beyond the grave.
Best wishes to you Nevine, it's been a little while, I hope you had a wonderful summer...
So you are a gifted visual artist, too. Glad to have you back.
Nevine, another side to your creative self. You draw as well!?!? Wow! Wonderful to see two dimensions of you in the same post (I meant the self as an artist who uses paints and words but the poem is also about two sides to the inner self) Too many juxtapositions, today.
I like what Martin has said and it's often so true.
Joy always,
Susan
David - And ain't that just the truth? So well put, my dear friend!
Cuban - Thank you for the praise. I like to think people will always be fascinated... even if what they see inside us is not so pretty. Imagine all the nuances of who we are... oh, the possibilities! So glad to see you back, Cuban!
Steve - It seems keeping things simple keeps them that way forever. I think when we try to see too much into stuff, that's when the complications begin. But we just can't seem to keep ourselves away from trying to see too much, can we? Thanks for the lovely thoughts, Steve.
Lou - I'm speechless before your heart-warming words. Yes, I now know that feeling of speechlessness too. ;-) Thank you, Lou.
Martin - A brilliant thought, for sure. And a reassuring one, too!
Owen - Your words are poetry and they make my heart sing. I truly don't know what to say. But yes, we are all in dungeons... but only sometimes. While we choose to go in the dungeon, for specks of time, we inevitably come back out... to catch the light that has been hunting us all along. The image... is a self-photograph. Inverted... twice. Which is the ghost? I would answer your question... if only I knew. ;-) Thank you, Owen.
Judy - A gifted visual artist I am not. The only art I can create is the art of words... humbly. I leave the visuals to others. I don't dare plunge into those waters... except for play... sometimes.
Susan - Oh no, not I! I can't draw to save my life. The Self-Portait is merely a photo of me, played up with some fun software. I thought it a nice complement to the poem, and so, why not? But thank you for your lovely thoughts, nevertheless. :-)
dearest friend - i am so remiss in my visiting of late - and i could tell you all the reasons why - of my own distractions in everyday life and it would matter not - the bottom line is that i have missed your words here - and simply want to tell you that - and these are magnificent words, magnificent! like a bouquet of magnificent long stemmed roses, thorns aside so as not to prick our fingers - although - i must confess i am not opposed to a pricking of my fingers once in a while for rose words magnificent as these - another beautiful write! thank you!
Our ghosts are pieces of ourselves we will always be. And they come in so many forms.
hauntingly beautiful, powerful and so profound!
who is our Ghost? it is what we fear the most, our uncovered desires that haunt us or maybe our true self, our spiritual mirror, our visions?... what's truly inside us.
I love the spirituality in you, my dearest, you're a person which is not bounded by time and space.
loving your creative style of writing.
be well,
big hugs!
betty xx
Oh! J'aime beaucoup la façon dont tu as joué avec ton portrait! Le côté noir opposé au côté blanc!
La lumière et l'obscurité. Le bien et le mal. L'un ne peut exister sans l'autre, n'est-ce pas?
J'ai beaucoup aimé le poème aussi. Et l'essence de ton être et la profondeur de ton âme, personne ne les connaît mieux que ton "ghost"!
¤ Big BIZZZOUZZZZ, ma belle ¤
Je repasserai plus tard lire TNL! Demain c'est retour au travail et j'ai encore plein de choses à faire;o)
¤ Belle après-midi et à bientôt ¤ Re-big-BIZZZOUZZZZ ¤
Jenean - I have not been the greatest at visiting, myself. It's so difficult to make my rounds when I'm so swamped, so I completely understand. When you do stop in, I'm glad to know you enjoy and linger for a while. Thank you for always being a dear.
Eva - Yes, I do agree.
Betty - Thank you, dearest, for your ever-present enthusiasm and encouragement. I always appreciate it, and I always appreciate the warmth of your words. I'm so happy to see you back in blogland, and I'll be swinging by... Hope you enjoyed a lovely summer break!
Mildred - Tu es une fée! Et tes pensées sont tellement profondes!!! C'est pour ça que je dis toujours que tu me comprends! Et... pour TNL... don't worry about it. C'est mon playground et rien de plus. Et on a tous beaucoup à faire. Alors, don't feel obligated, ma belle... Je sais que tu me rends visite quand tu peux, and that is enough for me, always! Wishing you a wonderful "new year" au boulot et big bisous!!! :-)
Coucou Nevine! La fée, c'est toi! Tu es la fée des mots, et ils t'obéissent au doigt et au stylo pour notre plus grand plaisir. Merci ma belle;o)
Je viens d'aller lire tes trois dernières pensées dans TNL;o)
Pour le "bliss", la première couleur qui m'est venue à l'esprit est "purple";o) C'est normal, c'est ma couleur préférée;o)
Pour la femme qui s'est imposée à toi et que tu as laissé naître dans ton esprit, qu'il en soit toujours ainsi;o)
Et les dernières lignes de ton dernier billet, pour moi qui aime la solitude et qui ai peur de la folie, m'ont laissé une sensation bizarre. Quelque chose d'ominous! Heureusement, je ne travestis pas trop la réalité des choses! Enfin, je crois;o)
¤ Big BIZZZOUZZZ, mon amie ¤
ps: admirer de beaux graffiti, en sirotant une bonne tasse de "earl grey" en écoutant Adagio in G minor by Albinoni ! He he he! Purple bliss;o)
He he he! j'ai beaucoup aimé la fin avec le bruit des criquets;o)
Se débarrasser du complexe de Cendrillon! C'est pas chose facile;o)
Ça me rappelle une chanson! " Être une femme libérée, tu sais c'est pas si facile!"
He he he! c'est ici: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nqr53tFiICY&feature=related
***
Big BIZZZOUZZZZ, ma belle* et très belle semaine avec plein de merveilleux concertos de criquets***
Can't stop picking roses and clipping their torns... Such an absolutely wonderful way to capture the obsession of this...self and self.
Sweet Nevine,
So many we are,
we are as many as our thoughts and emotions
It extends us, contracts us, divides and multiplies....
Yet behind all this there's one, an undisturbed one.... just outside our walls of fears
where our untainted purity is....where all our hearts,and all our faces blends into an everlasting renewal of our Beauty.
i'm so glad to see these glimses in you, no matter what you write.
PS:Thankyou for your comment on my last post!
Coucou ma belle!
Je viens te souhaiter une merveilleuse fin de semaine!
¤ Big BIZZZOUZZZ ¤ Passe mon bonjour à ton hubby;o) ¤
Mildred - You will never believe it, but my favorite color is purple, too! Oui, je crois que c'est le couleur du "bliss" aussi! Et pour la solitude, je l'adore aussi! I love people, mais parfois on a besoin de rester toute seule avec soi-meme! Merci pour tous les petits mots que tu me laisses ici, ma belle! Gros gros bisous!!!
Cildemer - Merci pour le link... la chanson! Et non, c'est pas du tout facile, non? He he he... Etre une femme... Merci Cremilde! Bises!!!
Kim - Oh, how beautifully you put it! Thank you for these words of enlightenment. I so appreciate them!
COL - It is the undisturbed one, yes, that always eludes! But still... I excavate. She hides inside... but I will find her yet! COL, you illuminate so many fresh thoughts about who we are... and why! Thank you for the pleasure of your warm presence. I always appreciate it...
Mildred - J'ai honte! Je suis absente depuis des jours... la vie m'a attrappee!!! Je passerai... maintenant. Attend... j'arrive!!! Bises... ;-)
Ma belle, on est bien obligés de répondre aux impératifs de la vie. Il n'y a pas à s'excuser! Viens quand tu peux, et aussi quand tu le désires. Je ne risque pas de t'oublier entre temps;o)
¤ BIG BIZZZOUZZZZ ¤
ps: he he he! Beaucoup de goûts en commun, tu ne trouves pas?
Je me demande quand c'est ton anniversaire. Peut-être qu'on est du même signe astrologique;o)
Mildred - Oui, c'est vrai qu'on a les mêmes goûts! J'suis des poissons. ;-) Merci, ma belle, pour ta gentillesse! Big bises!!! :-)
He he he! J'adore les poissons! Normal, je suis née au bord de la mer;o)
Merci pour ta réponse;o) et merci aussi pour tes petites visites chez moi;o)
¤ Gros BIZZZOUZZZZ, ma belle ¤ et à tout bientôt ¤
Even my ghost has the non-gift of denial...sometimes!--grin!
I would like to know how you go about writing...each step, each thought, each revision...the source of each inspiration while working a single poem--or series.
Beethoven left behind his notebooks, which reveal countless changes in phrasing, sentences (music has them--you know that!), lots of scratching-out, and rewriting of passages, even single notes were subject to many changings.
It is how we are treated to working of a genius mind.
Ya see what I'm sayin' Oh Queen?
LOVE and PEACE!
Here I am, catching up on your Distillation poems and I'm seeing the theme of inner conversation. Of warring with ourselves in that passive aggressive way we all do. Not wanting to see the truth but knowing it's there anyway.
Jai
Thanks for taking the time to navigate back and see where it all started, Jai. Yes, we do always fight ourselves... and it seems the harder we fight, the harder it becomes for us to see any truth at all.
....un efficace distillazione riflessiva: io penso che ognuno di noi nasca solo, viva solo e muoia solo. Il solo ospite che ci tiene compagnia ogni giorno è la nostra coscienza, che ragiona con il nostro spirito, e con la voce della ragione interiore. Dopo il primo vagito una società ci accoglie, ci dona il benvenuto purché la si ripaghi con un lavoro. Ecco, dove iniziano ad apparire i nostri fantasmi. L'uomo nasce libero, ma subito si ritrova in catene. Gli schemi che regolano una società sono gli stessi che poi rubano la libertà. E ad ogni nuova esperienza un nuovo fantasma che si annida nella psiche: il grande armadio degli abiti silenziosi. Cara Nevine, le tua 'distillazione', è ammirevole, ma non risolve l'atavico ed arcaico dilemma, dell'impossibile decifrazione esistenziale dell'uomo...complimenti per il disegno, sei bellissima, anche in bianco e nero, una delle infinite dualità che sostengono l'armonia del caos universale. Scusami se ho scritto tanto, ma tu, con la tua perspicacia hai toccato un tema molto profondo e tanto discusso nei secoli e secoli, amen....:-) bacio..
My dear Sergio, your comment touches me deeply. I am humbled by your ability to grasp the meanings of my words. I am also intrigued by your thoughts about existential reality. Or... is reality even the right word? Thank you for the dance of minds and thoughts you have elaborated with your words. I am grateful. Abbracci...
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